Much Information Makes Me . . . Mad?

Do you remember the statement Festus made to Paul in Acts 26?

Festus said with a loud voice, "Paul, you are beside yourself! Much learning is driving you mad!" Acts 26:24

There have been times I've been convinced that too much access to information online can drive a person crazy.  A few days ago I was bitten by some sort of insect.  It must have happened in my sleep as I noticed it when I got up in the morning.  My arm had a large red bump on it.  I didn't really think anything of it and wore long sleeves all day long.  At the end of the day I took a shower and got ready for bed.  Upon closer inspection I saw the red bump now had a squiggly red line coming out of it.  I mentally panicked a bit, but decided I should try to google some info to see if my life was in danger.  I couldn't find a good picture that matched my description, but I was pretty sure I must have been bitten by a brown recluse spider and my arm was in the process of rotting away.  The funny thing is that I've only seen one tiny harmless spider in our months of living at this house.  It's odd how the one deadly spider decided to attack me while in bed.

Jeff was in bed sleeping soundly at this point.  Thankfully I had enough common sense not to head directly to the ER.  I took my flashlight into the dark bedroom and woke him up and made him look at my arm.  He thought the squiggly line appeared to be on the surface of my skin.  I thought he was just too tired to care and wanted to go back to sleep.  I decided I would wait until morning before heading to the hospital.  Of course it was nothing and all signs of "necrosis" were gone by the time morning arrived. 

This incident reminded me how Abby once had a very high fever.  I googled her symptoms and was certain she had bacterial meningitis.  Ahh, the power of the internet.  It can diagnose our symptoms and convince us we are dying. 

In spite of my falters, I still want to keep my hope in my Savior, the Great Physician.  He is the one who controls our destiny and our health.  Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid. John 14:27

In Paul's case, too much study of God's Word had not made him crazy.  The foolishness of the Gospel made him appear so to unbelieving Festus.  If I'm going to be called crazy I want it to be because of the God I serve and my faith in His Word.   The foolishness of the Gospel message appears crazy to those around us with blinded eyes.  Oh that someday they will see the truth clearly. 

Paralyzing Fear

Has fear ever gripped you and wrapped it's tight chains around your heart?  I've had a few instances where I've been fearful for my physical safety. Two instances stand out in my mind.  One was a time when I was in a shower and couldn't hear my potential attacker breaking into my house (he never showed up) and another time I was very fearful in a tent when I was certain a neighbor was going to shoot us (that obviously didn't happen either). More often I'm fearful about the future, about personal finances, about a collapse of our economy, about a career change, about raising a child, about what others think of me.  It seems I overcome one fear and another one pops up.  And, believe me, I'm not a fearful, worrying type.  But I do have my moments.

When I am fearful it's wonderful to reflect on the ways God has protected me in the past.  (I really should begin a journal where I note each specific fear as they arise and then note how God provided and protected me.  I forget too quickly.) God's Word and prayer are great weapons to use to combat fear.  I love Psalm 121, a beautiful psalm of encouragement reminding us of God's constant presence and oversight of our life.  Verse 7 says:  "The LORD shall preserve you from all evil; He shall preserve your soul." The Hebrew word for "evil" seems to mean all physical evil, such as wild animals and unruly men (women too, I suppose).  And then the verse ends with the promise that God will preserve your soul.  How comforting is that?  This promise is similar to what Jesus said in Matthew 10: 28 "And do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. But rather fear Him who is able to destroy both soul and body in hell."

Tabletalk Magazine had an article in the September issue entitled "What if or if God?" The author, J.R. Vassar, asks if we will let fear keep us from obeying God.  Here is an excerpt:

When it comes to the issue of fear, we all face the same question.  Will I choose to quench the Spirit by cowering under the tyranny of the what if:  What if I fail?  What if I suffer?  What if I go without?  If God is prompting you to cross the street and engage a neighbor or to cross the ocean and invest your life among an unreached people, will the what if paralyze you?  If God is stirring your heart toward radical, future-shaping generosity, will the what if have the final say?  Will you let an unsanctified imagination stir up potential scenarios that argue you out of obedience to the Scriptures and the Spirit's promptings?

 He ends with this sentence:

If God is holy, sovereign, wise, good, powerful, and abounding in love, let us resolve to no longer ascribe greater authority to our fears than we do to God. 

I don't want fear to rule my life, but rather to be filled with faith in my Sovereign God who knows what is best for me and will give me grace to face any future trials.   I want to eradicate the "what ifs" in my life as I learn to lean more and more upon Savior.  What about you?

  I'm linking up with:

Faith: Living Upon Things Unseen

Too often I'm irritated by the minor inconveniences:  the creaking floors, the messy diapers, the distance to the nearest mall, days that are humid and stifling, and the constant interruptions by little Abby.  In the midst of it, I wonder: When when all of this end?  When can I rest?  When can I feel I'm finally home?

And of course you know the answer as found in Hebrews 4:9-11.  We will rest when our work is completed.  Not here, but in the presence of God.  We're sojourners traveling to a Holy City, whose "whose builder and maker is God."   What I am given today is my ministry.  I must realize this, accept it and embrace it as such. 

Horatius Bonar in his book, Night of Weeping and Morning of Joy, says:

Shall the disquieting bustle of this restless life annoy us? Faith tells us of the rest that remaineth for the people of God—the sea of glass like unto crystal on which the ransomed saints shall stand—no tempest, no tumult, no shipwreck there. Shall the lack of this world’s honors move us? Faith tells us of the exceeding and eternal weight of glory in reserve. Have we no place to lay our head? Faith tells us that we have a home, though not in Caesar’s house, a dwelling, though not in any city of earth. Are we fearful as we look around upon the disorder and wretchedness of this misgoverned earth? Faith tells us that the coming of the Lord draweth nigh. Do thoughts of death alarm us? Faith tells us that “to die is gain,” and whispers to us, “What, are you afraid of becoming immortal, afraid of passing from this state of death, which men call life, to that which alone truly deserves the name!”

I'll Pass on the Poison, Thank You

Since becoming a mother, I've been introduced to a brand-new universe of fears:  recalls of products, pesticides in foods, vaccines, toxic chemicals, additives, heavy metals, hormones in foods, meat glue, and the list goes on and on.  Every week I share a new concern about a food or product with Jeff.  He typically doesn't take information about these food items too seriously and usually comments that this does not affect his daily life.

I believe God has given us all foods to enjoy and man has tainted many of them in our quest to produce more foods faster and at a lower cost.    Upon this cursory research I'm beginning to wonder if Jesus might be referring to the foods we consume in everyday life when he mentions if they drink any deadly poison it will not hurt them. Mark 16:18  (And no, I'm not being entirely serious.)

I think most women are prone to worry. If I allowed these fears of potential harm to take control I would only grow my own food and live a cloistered life from now till my death.  I don't believe that's exactly what God intended for my family.  How can the world learn about our Savior if all Christians went and hid in secluded locations? Christ desires for us to mature spiritually as we fellowship with the believers at our local church body.  That's impossible if we're cut off from civilization.  This would also prevent us from practicing the "pure religion" of caring for the orphans and widows as mentioned in James.  This verse also adds that we are to remain unspotted from the the world.  Our goal should be to become/remain irreproachable in this world as opposed to shielding ourselves from all environmental ills. Facing these tangible fears in a calm and faith-filled manner can be a testimony to those around us.

So until I'm in heaven sampling fruit off the tree of life I'll pray and ask God to bless the poison right out of all the food I eat.

God's GPS

Yesterday we returned from a whirlwind trip through several states. It was a quest to find a new job for Jeff. We knew we wouldn't live in this current location long, but where exactly does God want us? I wish we had a GPS sent from God with turn-by-turn directions. Why did the Israelites have reason to complain when they had the shekinah glory leading the way? But God asks us to walk by faith and the last two and a half years have certainly been a test of my faith.

The trip was not successful in the sense that Jeff did not find a job. We met some wonderful brothers and sisters in Christ who went out of their way to help us. The spiritual bond we have in Christ is amazing, isn't it? We enjoyed visiting parts of our country that have blooming flowers and budding trees. We had lots of family time together. And we were able to rule out several possible options.

I told one of my dearest friends this morning that it appears we have come to the fork in the road similar to Abraham and Lot. I am desiring the lush beautiful land of certain states we have explored, but God is going to send us to a land that may initially seem like a dry wasteland, but this location will help us bear an abundance of spiritual fruit. We are seeing God's hand move us in a new direction. Stay tuned for details.