Book Review: Parenting In the Pew

Just over a month ago I came across a review of this Parenting in the Pew book.  I believe I read the review on a Monday following a squirming Sunday service so I decided to purchase the book and try to glean anything I could about how to better prepare Abby for worship. 

Our church is very child-friendly and does not have a nursery.  It doesn't bother our pastor or the members to have wiggly toddlers making noises throughout the service.  (At least that's what I've been told.  I truly think Abby's noises bother me more than they do others.)  I've been on Pinterest and received inspiration about busy bags.  We've tried lots of things to distract her and just keep her quiet.  That's what I've seen other parents doing so I thought that's what you do at this age.  Well, Robbie has helped me understand it's important to teach your child(ren) to be an active listener and participant in the worship service.  She explains how she once attended church for her own benefit and blessing, but then realized she should be there to worship and bring glory to God.  This point was important to me as I found it so difficult when Abby was an infant to attend services.  It seemed I never got anything out of the service, but I think God was more pleased with me making the commitment to be at church.  Some days I wanted to listen to the pastor in the nursery, but was interrupted by other moms sharing their needs.  Those sacrifices only last so long and soon your child is entering a new stage . . . toddlerhood. 

Robbie provides these suggestions for parents:

• It's the responsibility of parents not Sunday School teachers or Junior Church teachers to teach children how to worship.  (And I'm not convinced that Sunday School/Junior Church is biblical).
• Worship does take work and requires preparation on Saturday, not just Sunday morning. 
• Teach your child to tithe with their first gifts of money.  I remember tithing a penny out of my first dime!
• Make sure your children sit with you as they grow up.  Eliminate diversions and this includes children sitting with their little friends.
• Teach them at an early age to sing hymns as you point out the words for them to follow.
• Teach them to imagine the story that is taking place as they sit through an instrumental song or offertory.
• Ask questions about the sermon afterward to see how much they understood.
• Don't allow the child to leave for bathroom breaks unless it's an emergency.  Take them before the service and avoid the shiny water fountain.   

I really appreciated Robbie's insight.  I plan to implement several of her ideas, but first I must wean my little one off of the snacks and distractions.  I also want to use some of the listening sheets that can be found on Pinterest now.   It's so important for children to be taught to listen.  I remember my Grandma Barrett pointing out the word "Jesus" to me and I was able to find it on the pages of her Bible before I could even read. 

I think it's important for families to worship God throughout the week.  And it doesn't necessarily have to be too structured at first.  Sit down and have prayer when you hear that someone has passed away or get a call about a loved one's car accident.  Read a Bible story to them before they go to bed.  Tell and act out a Bible story.  I know it's frustrating when they are little and don't want to finish, but it's preparing them for more later.  Keep those appetizers coming!

Robbie is a Presbyterian so there are references to their liturgical worship style and infant baptism.  The book is ten years old, but I still found it relevant.  I did purchase it used and wouldn't recommend purchasing it at full price (which I don't think I've ever done for any book).  It is a short read at 139 pages, but seems to cover an oft-neglected topic.  It definitely made me look at how I worship with differently. 

Happy 1st Birthday!

Abby in her birthday hat celebrating a few days early!

Tomorrow we celebrate Abby's first birthday.   What an eventful year it has been.  My life drastically changed in the last year.   We are so blessed with our energetic explorer.  Both of us wonder how we managed to enjoy such a boring life before she arrived. It's also fascinating to look back and see how God prepared our steps before giving us the responsibility of raising our little daughter.

"To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace." Eccl. 3:1-8

 If you care to read the wordy birth story . . .

Project 64: Brick Red

It has not been my intention to skip any colors, but I seem to have missed the deadlines for the last two colors.  Now that cooler temperatures are here to stay I must make it a priority to get out and shoot some pictures.

This afternoon Abby and I went out in the yard and I raked a big pile of leaves and plopped her down into them.  She wasn't too impressed with the prickly brown objects around her.  I tried shooting a few photos, but most didn't include a happy expression.  This one below was taken after all remnants of leaves were brushed off.

Visit Project 64 for additional red brick entries.

Baby Steps

Tonight Abby took her very first baby steps.  The neighbors probably heard us cheering and clapping through our opened windows.  Our reaction motivated her to continue trying to walk until she was totally exhausted. How exciting to reach this milestone.  I suppose I'll soon regret the fact that she can walk as that means more baby-proofing (I should sell baby-proofing gift baskets, it seems to be a fairly untapped market.)

These baby steps reminded me to be thankful we have a healthy child.  Don't we take this for granted too often?  There are parents who will never see their baby walk.  There are parents who never had a chance to meet their baby on this earth. There are parents who are see their child regress as disease destroys their little body. 

These baby steps also remind me that I should be constantly growing as a Christian.  I should be more disciplined and desire to be challenged spiritually through seeking out conversations with unbelievers, immersing myself in books of the Bible that seem to be difficult to grasp, and taking time to pray about all things.  It takes discipline to grow and I'm so easily distracted. 

	And I, brethren, could not speak to you as to spiritual [people] but as to carnal, as to babes in Christ. I fed you with milk and not with solid food; for until now you were not able [to receive it], and even now you are still not able; for you are still carnal. For where [there are] envy, strife, and divisions among you, are you not carnal and behaving like [mere] men?I Corinthians 3:1-3

As a Christian, in which category might you be found:  infant, child, adolescent, or mature adult?  Are you continuing to exhibit behavior found only in "babies?"

Lies on the Playground

“Truth is the agreement of our ideas with the ideas of God.” Jonathan Edwards

Abby and I volunteered at our local elementary school today.  The kindergarten class needed extra help during lunch and recess so I decided to give it a shot.  I was at a disadvantage as I didn't know much about the schedule and hadn't met any of the students or teachers before today.  I'm not sure I actually provided much assistance.  The lunch room was incredibly noisy.  So noisy it was difficult to focus.  I saw several little ones putting their hands over their ears as it was way more stimulation than they could handle.  Abby loved the noise and the children and let out a few shrieks in her little 11-month old voice.

It was a sunny warm day so the kids released their pent up energy on the playground after lunch.  I had worked with 5-17 year-olds in my mentoring program, but was never around this many kindergartners at one time.  They were so rambunctious.  I became exhausted watching them (perhaps carrying Abby in the hot sun was a factor also).  There was some pushing and tussling; the normal kids being kids.

I found it quite interesting that I was a lied to a few times.  Once by two little boys who told me they were allowed to play out on the soccer field, when I later learned this was not the case.  They obviously knew I wouldn't know the difference.  And another little boy didn't want to get into line so he told me he wasn't part of the class, which was a lie.  Isn't it amazing how little hearts are full of lies at such an early age?  They desire to manipulate and deceive without being taught to do so (although some do have negative role models).

The wicked are estranged from the womb; They go astray as soon as they are born, speaking lies. Psalm 58:3

We are all born depraved sinners going our own selfish way; living a life full of lies and hypocrisy.  For those of us who have since been converted, we still sometimes revert to our lying ways.   Our church is beginning a ladies' study on the book of 1 John.  I've been re-reading it numerous times so I can begin to dig deeper into the meaning of passages.  Tonight this verse popped out at me:

If someone says, "I love God," and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen, how can he love God whom he has not seen?I John 4:20

I'll admit I've been guilty of this.  I would never outwardly state I hate a brother or sister, but there have been times I've harbored hatred and unforgiveness toward them.  And there are times I've seen another Christian sin and felt hatred toward them, not because I was affected, but because they dared commit such a heinous act.  I realize we as Christians should hate sin, but I have hated the sinner when they happen to be a professing Christian.  With God's help I want to work on replacing the lies with forgiveness, prayer and genuine love. 

May I say with Solomon:

For my mouth will speak truth; Wickedness is an abomination to my lips. [and my heart] Proverbs 8:7

Today I'm linked up with:

Project 64: Cadet Blue

After waiting until the last minute to take a photograph, I remembered I had a derby hat still in a box in the garage.  I dug it out and took a photo.  I decided to include some outtakes of Abby and the hat, just because I think she's adorable. 

Visit Project 64 to view more Cadet Blue entries!

The Floor Is Her Buffet?

Abby has a very bad habit and I would suppose many other babies her age share in this same bad habit:  she enjoys eating food (and nonfood) off our floor.  Now that she's feeding herself somewhat eventually some of the food on her tray is flung off and ends up on the floor.  Most of the big pieces are picked up right away, but without fail there will be a stub of a green bean of a nibble of macaroni noodle that ends up under the cabinet ledge where I don't see it.  When she's allowed to explore and comes crawling back into the kitchen a few hours later, she locates the food she disposed of earlier.  (Maybe this is similar to dogs returning to the food they buried).  I'll be busy cooking or washing dishes and will notice she's chewing on something.  I'll quickly swipe my finger in her mouth to discover it's leftovers from the previous meal.  Ewww.  The sad thing is that I have lots of snacks and a pantry full of good food I would give her, but she chooses to eat off of the floor. 

I wonder if God sometimes looks at our behavior with disgust.  He's provided us with the spiritual nourishment we need and yet we choose to dig in the garbage can of self-help books, romance novels, TV talk shows, sexually explicit movies, God-bashing music, and prosperity-Gospel preachers to feed our soul.  How this must sadden His heart.  I've been guilty also.  I have the Bread of Life.  How dare I consider eating the husks the world has to offer?  All my hunger pangs will vanish when I feast on the spiritual food.  Yet I choose to wander away from the Father's house to pick through the leftovers on the floor. 

Note to self:

• It takes effort to make God's Word a priority in my life.  It goes against my sinful nature.  I must make it a priority by refusing to sit down and enjoy my music/TV show/morning walk/current book until I've consumed some of His Word. 
• Nothing but the Bread of Life will satisfy my hungry soul.  I must daily return to feast on the gourmet buffet God has provided.    I must not let it sit undevoured.
• If it's a temptation, avoid it.  Stay away from the places that offer the empty husks of the world.  If I know a TV show will enthrall me for the next hour and I haven't taken time to feast on God's Word that day, I should keep the TV off.  I must avoid the "junk food."
• Don't settle for milk, if steak and potatoes are an option.  I must use the tools God has provided to grow in my faith:  a concordance, online study helps, a spiritual mentor, a God-fearing husband.

"Jesus then said to them, 'Truly, truly, I say to you, it was not Moses who gave you the bread from heaven, but my Father gives you the true bread from heaven.  For the bread of God is he who comes down from heaven and gives life to the world." They said to him, "Sir, give us this bread always.' Jesus said to them, "I am the bread of life; whoever comes to me shall not hunger, and whoever believes in me shall never thirst." John 6:32-35

Where have you been feasting today?

Our Prayer Journal

Today I was out shopping and found a tiny blank scrapbook for $.50.  I purchased it thinking I could find a use for it.  It didn't take long to formulate a plan.  I recalled my mom putting together some prayer cards when we were quite young.  She glued pictures from magazines onto construction paper to remind us who to pray for.  I used that idea and created a prayer journal for Abby and I to use.  It's as much for my own use as for her's.  I cut out pictures of family members and used the mounting tabs to secure them in there.  I'm not extremely creative, but I found it quite enjoyable to decorate the prayer journal.  I am using pictures from magazines or cards to remind us what to be thankful for also.  If I can't find a picture of an item I'll just use my fun alphabet stickers to spell out the word to pray for. 

Tomorrow morning we will use it for the first time.  My greatest difficulty will be getting her to sit still as we point, pray and praise.  It will also be a challenge to keep her from eating my handiwork.  Why does she think paper is tasty? 

My heart's desire is that Abby will learn more and more about God and how to glorify Him through our daily actions.  I want her to see Him in the sunshine, our playtime, and even the birds we hear.  How will she know that "by Him all things consist" unless we talk about Him, read about Him, and pray to Him?

"But when Jesus saw it, He was greatly displeased and said to them, "Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of God."  Mark 10:14

How can we bring children to Jesus Christ to be blessed? We cannot do it in a corporeal sense, for Jesus is not here, "he is risen;" but we can bring our children in a true, real, and spiritual sense. We take them up in the arms of our prayer. I hope many of us, so soon as our children saw the light, if not before, presented them to God with this anxious prayer, that they might sooner die than live to disgrace their father's God. We only desired children that we might in them live over again another life of service to God; and when we looked into their young faces, we never asked wealth for them, nor fame, nor anything else, but that they might be dear unto God, and that their names might be written in the Lamb's Book of Life.             -C. H. Spurgeon in Children Brought to Christ, and not to the Font

Loaded with His Benefits

"Blessed be the Lord, who daily loadeth us with benefits, even the God of our salvation." Psalm 68:19

Will you try to think of the benefits which you have received, dear brother, dear sister? Turn them over now in your mind—the benefits that you have actually yourself received—not only read of, and heard of, and had promises of, but that you have received. Oh! the benefits of early education! Of being restrained from sin. Oh! the benefits of conviction! Of being enlightened and made to see the guilt of sin. Oh! the sweet benefit of being led to the Saviour! made to stand at the cross foot, where the blood speaks better things than that of Abel. Oh! the benefit of perfect pardon and of righteousness, which covers us and justifies in the sight of God! What an unspeakable benefit is regeneration! Who shall prize the benefit of adoption? Who is he that shall describe the benefit of daily education in the things of God—of preservation from falling into final, vital sin—of sanctification carried on from day to day? We have benefits that we know of, but we probably have ten times as many that we know not of. Some of them come in at the front door of the house; some of the richest of them seem to steal in at the back door. They are among the most precious bounties that fly in with so soft a wing that we hear them not when they come. Ye shall sooner count the hairs on your head, or the dust upon the sand beach, than you shall be able to estimate the number of His benefits.  - Spurgeon 

I am grateful for the blessing of my husband and little Abby. Abby turns nine-months-old tomorrow.  I've finally begun to share a little of her birth story.  It was an uneventful pregnancy followed by life-threatening complications post-birth.  Those details will follow in the near future.  Until then, here's the story of us learning God was blessing us with a child. 

Project 64: Wisteria

Abby adores the pool and was a brave little soul when "daddy" took her down the water slide and water got in her face.   I must admit I wasn't too thrilled with this dangerous feat.  

Her expression isn't too happy here as she was so hot and I hadn't put her in the pool yet.  I think her swimsuit is a pretty good wisteria match.

For additional wisteria entries, visit Project 64. 

God's Creativity

Yesterday afternoon Jeff, Abby and I took a stroll on one of the local nature trails.  We didn't stay out too long as Abby wasn't entirely thrilled with the idea of riding in the stroller for any length of time.

Not enjoying her ride too much.  Note the bruise on her forehead from lots of recent tumbles.

The sun was brightly shining and soon our senses were flooded with the smells, colors, and sounds of spring.  We were especially excited to see so many varieties of birds:  ducks, geese, yellow warblers, sandpipers, osprey, and several others I couldn't identify as I hadn't brought along our field guide.

I was reminded of God's creativity.  Only a creative God would create thousands of species of birds, melodious calls for mankind to enjoy, flowers in numerous colors, and an array of pleasant smells emanating from the blossoms on trees and flowers.  He created all things according to His will and pleasure.  If we enjoy the beauty of this earth now, how much more will we enjoy that which is not tainted by sin's ugly curse?

I find it fascinating that man or woman in expensive designer clothes does not compare to the delicate beauty of the lilies in the field.  Matthew 6:29   We serve the greatest Designer.  Those of us who have been redeemed are His masterpieces, handcrafted for a specific purpose in His kingdom. Ephesians 2:10

New Mommy Style

I’ve noticed the clothing I wear has morphed into "new mommy style" in the last six months.  Before I dress each day I go through a checklist of questions:

• Have I invested enough money into this item that it’s not worth ruining today?  I’ve been able to get most stains out, but there are a few select items it’s not worth taking a chance on.
• Can I nurse in this?  This rules out almost all dresses.  Someday I shall wear them again.
• Is the shirt long enough?  Seems I need longer shirts after becoming a mommy.  I have a couple of theories, but won’t share them at this time.
• Would this pattern or color camouflage puke, drool, and remnants of baby food?  Someone should absolutely come up with a new camouflage pattern just for mommies and perhaps it could be absorbent too.  And disposable clothing sounds like a good idea.
• Is this shirt sturdy enough to provide modesty if my daughter decides to pull down on the neckline?  Why is this fun for babies?  I’ve had to jerk my neckline up so many times when wearing any stretchy comfy shirt in public.  
• Will this fabric became a lint roller if I decide to play on the floor with Abby?  Never a good look and difficult to rectify unless you have some duct tape handy.  
• Does this outfit reveal my lack of muscle tone in the stomach area?  I’ve lost the baby weight, but my body shape has changed.  Guess I have to actually work at toning those muscles if I want that flat stomach again.  Oh well, too much time and effort.  Maybe some other day.  

Today I learned I should not wear a flowing knee-length skirt when carrying Abby.  When the wind picks up and your skirt also gets a little lift, it’s difficult to know what’s a priority . . . keeping your baby safely grasped in your arms or tucking the skirt down.   


I love shopping for affordable clothing at resale shops and on clearance racks.  Guess it's time to hit a few stores and expand my wardrobe a bit.  Of course, what woman really needs an excuse to shop for clothing?

For Our Children

My life has been blessed since the birth of little Abby.  I never knew how much a child could transform a mother's life.  I also never realized how quickly the sin nature becomes evident.  She is quite obviously a stubborn child, but I love her regardless. 

When I began assembling a baby scrapbook to remember Abby's milestones I discovered this poem that Amy Carmichael had written.  I printed it off and included it on one of the pages.  In honor of Mother's Day, here's that poem:

For Our Children

Father, hear us, we are praying,
Hear the words our hearts are saying;
We are praying for our children.

Keep them from the powers of evil,
From the secret, hidden peril;
Father, hear us for our children.

From the whirlpool that would suck them,
From the treacherous quicksand, pluck them;
Father, hear us for our children.

From the wordling’s hollow gladness,
From the sting of faithless sadness,
Father, Father, keep our children.

Through life’s troubled waters steer them;
Through  life’s bitter battle cheer them;
Father, Father, be Thou near them.

Read the language of our longing,
Read the wordless pleadings thronging,
Holy Father, for our children.

And wherever they may bide,
Lead them Home at eventide.

Ointment in the Eye

Abby has had a blocked tear duct since birth.  It's been an annoyance as I'm always cleaning the crustiness or goop off.  People ask questions and her eye looks unappealing in photos.  At her doctor's appointment on Monday her doctor prescribed some antibiotic ointment for the eye.  I'm also supposed to massage the blocked duct with a warm washcloth and a little baby shampoo each time I change her diaper.  She doesn't mind that.  But the instructions accompanying the ointment are a bit more complicated.  The pharmacist stepped over to the consultation window and reviewed the steps with me:  "Now put a 1/2 inch strip on the inner lower eyelid  three times a day for seven days."  I should have requested a demonstration.  I never knew a baby could squeeze her eyelid closed so tightly.  I'm fearful I'll jab the tip of the tube into her eyeball as she thrashes her head around screaming.   Her long black eyelashes end up covered in the ointment and I just hope some of it will soak into the eye area.  I even talked Jeff into trying it as I wanted him to realize how difficult this was.  He essentially failed also.  Now I've resorted to holding up one of her favorite toys with my left hand and distracting her as I quickly try to squeeze a bit of the ointment into the eye.  Ahhh, the challenges of motherhood.   Yes, I'm still grateful to be a mother to my precious daughter. 

Little Imitator

Abby is only six months old, but she's already beginning to imitate her mother.  She prefers to type on my laptop and grabs the remote and the wireless mouse to use.  It can be quite frustrating as I give her the toys she's supposed to play with and she chooses to use my "toys."   She attempts to make the same silly noises I do when I'm playing with her.  She's already imitating me and it's a frightening realization. 

What am I teaching her at this young age?  Are my attitudes, my habits, and my verbal responses ones I want her to imitate?   Do I have reason to be embarrassed to have a daughter follow in my footsteps?

It's a challenge to be purposeful in my parenting.  I posses the proper ingredients to be a godly parent, as found in God's Word. Am I using each of them in daily living?

Sleep in the Midst of the Storm

Last night we took Abby  on her very first camping trip.  The temperature seemed to be ideal and rain was not in the forecast.  It was a bit windy when we set up, but we continued to check the weather for storms.  

The night began without incident and Abby went to sleep without any trouble, but then the wind began to blow.  It grew stronger and stronger as the gusts reached nearly 50 mph. I finally put Abby between us and then laid awake praying we would stay safe.  I didn't fear the tent blowing away as there was plenty of weight holding it in place, but the thought of the tent poles cracking and ricocheting into our faces didn't seem like a pleasant prospect. 

For most of us our fears grow significantly worse in the dark.  All I could hear was the wind howling, the rain fly flapping and the poles groaning as they strained under the pressure.  Jeff and I barely got any sleep.  And what about little Abby?  She slept peacefully through nearly all of it, waking only at her usual time for her early morning snack.  She had no fear as her parents were there to protect her. 

Jesus slept through a severe storm one night about two thousand years ago.  He was able to relax enough to sleep as He had nothing to fear.  The weather obeyed Him since He was in control. Mark 4:39 I thought of this story as I lay there praying for safety as I embraced our sleeping six month old.  Our Sovereign God is in control of the weather and I asked Him to calm the storm and keep our tent standing.  Eventually the calm came and we enjoyed a few hours of sleep.  We were safe and the tent had absolutely no damage.  Cabela's makes quality tents, but I'll give God the credit for this one. 

We were the only tent out there last night as everyone else was safely ensconced in their RVs and fifth wheels.  I'm sure the other campers were questioning the sanity of the couple in the tent with a baby.  We did not intentionally "tempt" God, but I'm so thankful He looks out for us when we put ourselves in precarious situations. 

The Monster Inside of Me

Have you ever watched the show "Monsters Inside of Me?"  I've opted not to, but have seen brief glimpses of the show's previews.  It's disturbing to consider how humans could have parasites invade their body and wreak havoc.  This thought creeps me out enough to want to avoid seeing specific details. 

I thought of this show today as I was trying to teach Abby (now 6 months old) the meaning of the word "No."  I realized she had no idea what this word meant when I used it on her a few days ago.  I had a four-month-old in my arms and Abby was on the floor playing.   She rolled and scooted her way over to an entertainment system and became fascinated with the cords.  Anything that looks remotely interesting goes into her mouth and I wanted to stop her so I told her "No" in a firm voice.  She had not really heard that word before so she ignored me. I was forced to get up in the middle of feeding the baby and roll Abby back to safety. 

Since then I realized I must teach her what the word means before she's faced with a more serious temptation.  She likes to flip over onto her belly while I'm changing her diaper.  It's cute to see how fast she moves, but I decided I would use "No" on her each time she tries to do this.  I tested the word out several times today and each time it made her mad because I was not allowing her to do what she wanted to do.  The monster inside her has began to rear his ugly head.  Isn't it amazing how early this happens?  It's become fairly obvious that we have a stubborn and selfish child.  Oh, she's adorable and we love her dearly, but she's infected with the monster of a sinful nature, just as we all are. Sinful from birth as Psalm 51:5 tells us. 

The monster of this sinful nature cannot be conquered until Christ's redeems that individual.  Even then we continue to battle it's uprisings against our spiritual nature until we receive our glorified body.  I'm praying for wisdom and the courage to be consistent when it comes to teaching little Abby.  The monster can be defeated through Jesus Christ, the One who crushed Satan's head on the very first Easter.